Querying Sucks (But You’re Doing Great)

You’ve got a finished manuscript. You’ve researched agents. You’ve rewritten your query more times than you’ve vacuumed this month. (No judgment—I, too, prioritize fictional people over dust bunnies.)

And now? You’re refreshing your inbox like it owes you money.

Welcome to the Query Trenches™, friend.

First, let’s exhale.

Querying is not for the faint of heart. It’s vulnerable. It’s weird. It requires you to write a professional sales pitch about a book that cost you three years, seven breakdowns, and one cursed Word doc.

Honestly, you deserve a trophy just for showing up.

But let’s talk about how to stay sane in the process—and maybe even have a little fun while doing it.

Tip #1: You Don’t Need to Be Cool

I’ve seen queries that try so hard to be clever, they forget to be clear. Look, I love a good pun. But if your query reads like a stand-up routine, I’m probably not sure what your book is about.

But here’s the thing: you don’t have to stifle your voice either. You don’t need to sound like a business robot in slacks. If you’re warm and funny? Let that shine through. If you’re dry and to-the-point? Great. If you’re a little weird in a charming way? Honestly, yes please.

Just tell me about your book—what it is, who it’s for, why it matters—and do it in a way that sounds like you.

That’s enough. Really.

Tip #2: Don’t Panic-Revise Every 3 Hours

You send a query. Ten minutes pass. No reply. You reread the query. You hate it. You rewrite it. You resend it to someone else.

Repeat until your laptop melts.

Sound familiar?

Here’s the truth: Your query is probably fine. Perfect? Maybe not. But if your manuscript is strong and your concept is compelling, a decent query will do its job. Don’t spiral. Don’t revise yourself into madness. Step away.

Tip #3: Rejections Aren’t (Necessarily) Red Flags

Agents reject projects for 4,000 reasons that have nothing to do with your writing. The market. Their mood. Their inbox. Mercury in retrograde.

Rejections can sting, especially the form ones. (“Dear Author” is not the warm hug you wanted today.) But often, they just mean not right now, or not for me. Not you suck.

So take the rejection. Vent. Stomp around. Then send the next one. Your people are out there.

Tip #4: Give Yourself a Life Raft

Here’s what no one says loud enough: You need other things to care about. While you’re querying, please, for the love of coffee, give yourself something to do that’s not watching your inbox load.

Start a new project. Bake a pie. Rewatch every season of The Great British Bake Off. Build a Pinterest board for your characters’ outfits. Just don’t make querying your entire personality.

It will drive you bonkers.

Final Thoughts from the In-Box Trenches

I’ve read thousands of queries. I’ve seen authors give up too soon. I’ve seen authors query for literal years, land an agent, and go on to do amazing things.

If you’re here, you’re already ahead. You’re in the arena.

So take a breath. Hit send. Then go live a life worth writing about.

You’ve got this.

—Vicky

(P.S. Yes, we really do mean it when we say, “Not the right fit.” No, it doesn’t mean your book is bad. Promise.)